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In 2009 well covered by the media the relationship of a British couple broke up as a consequence of a virtual escapade: Lisa caught her friend John while he was engaged in the virtual community “Second Life” under the nickname “Troy Hammerthal” having Avatar sex with a man.
Instead having to deal with the dry reality of my relationship and the potentially irritating conflicts I seek refuge in a fantasy world where I have maximal control over the (prevailing) events. A clever Internet-operators as for instance Yahoo already even offer platforms especially targeting married folks who are looking for a little excitement on the side (for instance marriedandflirtingchat.com).
The user also lives protected by a virtual identity, never must reveal him/herself, when things start to get uncomfortable, his dreams, desires can “disappear” with a click.
In the real world the escapade leaves no traces – thus the danger of being found out is considerably reduced.
Just as with the consumption of porn it is not even necessary to leave home in order to virtually stray.
The boundaries of space and time have been removed.
Obviously, that represents a high potential for addiction! or maybe even assuming an entirely new virtual identity and with it do everything that one would have never dared do in real life? At first blush these “little escapades” leaving every-day-life and the real partnership behind may appear to be harmless, but they are by no means that.
One click, and my boring, stressful every-day relationship is a thing of the past and an exciting virtual world loaded with countless opportunities (and flirting prospects) lies ahead. what could possibly be wrong with a little relaxing passionate cybersex-banter after a stressful day at work . By now many studies have demonstrated that the betrayed experience virtual unfaithfulness like the real thing.2011 according to a leading Austrian attorney: “In Austria Facebook and the like already play a role in every 10th divorce – and that means: of 1.900 divorces annually. ” represents the first step into the, at first virtual imagined and frequently also amorous escapade later converted to reality.When something at home doesn’t work as expected only very few can resist the temptation to look for old infatuations or the first love. An indication that this estimated number appears to be growing in leaps and bounds is demonstrated by the fact that it has already been the cause for the development of a lucrative business model: We are already aware of specialized computer companies earning their keep at cracking the password of a Facebook- (or other social network) account! Cyber affairs are a frequently underrated threat to relationships – the standard excuse of those caught red handed is hapless John’s already quoted as: “Nothing really happened! Although it may be correct that no real (physical) cheating took place; after everything is said and done, a virtual betrayal is even more damaging to the partnership.The realization that one’s own partner desires another person more than oneself triggers intense insecurity.At the same time such an act of virtual infidelity is more of a threat than the consumption of porn because the counterpart also appears to be more concrete as a person than some anonymous porn performer.My husband is more interested in the super bowl than in me and has once again forgotten to bring the soda along?