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15-Feb-2020 08:38 by 4 Comments

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” Which brings me to the subject of today’s post, seven deadly mistakes made when dating a Dutch man.

Would like to thank all of the ladies that were kind enough to share your tales of dating woe with me.

She was behind a curtain, having a good massage when she heard a voice in English asking one of the staff, “what kind of massages do you provide here?

” The staff member responded “pressure point massage.” The English voice asked, “what other kinds of massage?

” To which the response was, “pressure point massage.” The inquisitive chap on the other side of the curtain pressed on. ” the voice of the staff member was now getting louder, “we do normal massage.” The English voice pressed on and finally got to the point, “what about a happy ending?

” At which point the response was “you dirty man, you get out now!

The shallow man advises that on the day of the date, that you put your TV on Nederland een, between 7 and 9 and watch Vandaag de Dag.

Look at how poorly dressed the presenters of this show are and simply copy them. Your date will love you and not fear for the money in his wallet.

I say this simply because, Dutch women, in spite of often dressing as if the Netherlands has a permanent power outage, and they can only choose what to wear in the dark, are amongst the most beautiful women that you’ll see anywhere in the world.

That in itself would be reason enough for every Dutch male to get down on their hands and knees and thank God, Buddha or Allah that they are lucky enough to be born here, but they have an even better reason to be blissfully happy.

” no starter, or main course just a sprint through to dessert.

The Shallow Man is risking a storm of abuse by bringing this up again, but, I’ve been told repeatedly by expat women, even as recently as yesterday (thank you Vittoria) that Dutch men are tighter than a virgin female flea.

The previously charming Dutchmen then breaks out into a cold sweat and looks at the bill, at you, at the bill, then at you again, and there is a silence so deep that you can hear the female mice in the cafe coughing. Do not under any circumstances expect him to pay your part of the bill.

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